thebackalleys
pillows and mountain dew
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Entertainment / Re: Mass Effect Androgyna
« Last post by rtil on Today at 04:35 PM »
this game has permanently cemented itself as the poster child of how not to do 3d character animation. bravo bioware
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Entertainment / Re: Mass Effect Androgyna
« Last post by BluPhoenix on Today at 02:49 PM »


the part at 9:51 where the guy just leaps out of the game makes me lose my shit every time
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The Gallery / Re: Unless' poetry and lyric thread.
« Last post by Unless on Yesterday at 09:29 PM »
Story of my life.

Edit - Normally I get a bit more than 35 minutes though. I guess just look at the ‘Numeromancy’ thing above though. I'm not really up for writing anything new like that right now.
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The Gallery / Re: Unless' poetry and lyric thread.
« Last post by Bamyasi on Yesterday at 09:25 PM »
Well you tried.
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The Gallery / Re: Unless' poetry and lyric thread.
« Last post by Bamyasi on Yesterday at 08:51 PM »
Post something that's only or mostly good for its wordplay then I'm quite curious.
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The Gallery / Re: Unless' poetry and lyric thread.
« Last post by Unless on Yesterday at 08:48 PM »
I usually find that much less fun both to read and write.
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General / Re: thread of bad: user's guide version
« Last post by Bamyasi on Yesterday at 08:45 PM »
In defense of Jojo I think a lot of the terribly overwrought exposition enhances the absurd tone as you mentioned. It does get grating but at least it's mostly propelled by action. Supplements the story with dumb, flawed narration instead of outright replacing it like in the Appleseed page I posted.
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The Gallery / Re: Unless' poetry and lyric thread.
« Last post by Bamyasi on Yesterday at 08:35 PM »
less about wordplay and more about evoking feelings, because...
That's what good writing tends to be you know.

Can't say much about the poem because I know jack about critiquing poetry and even less about free verse.

I will say your language is has definitely improved from page one. Gets the point across far, far better. I'd say work on your metre but this reads a lot like song lyrics so maybe that's what you were going for.

But yeah definitely keep trying to write about things instead of about words. That's a good rule for anyone I think.
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The Gallery / Unbrilliant pebble.
« Last post by Unless on Yesterday at 07:31 PM »
(click to show/hide)

I think this is the first time in a while I've felt like writing something that's less about wordplay and more about evoking feelings, because... well, it should probably be obvious if you read it. We don't have personal blogs here or anything and it's not exactly something I felt comfortable bringing up and still isn't.


Quote from: Unbrilliant pebble.
Precious beautiful boy, stupid little fool boy, sakes alive, what am I to do?
You didn't realise you belonged, and I guess I waited too long to tell you all the things I never knew I had to.
A wicked world of damned doubts, a sudden single strikeout, can't believe I'm still here and yet you're gone.
Now I guess I'll try to stick it out, but everything is so wrong and life has no business just going on.

I have never felt more sorry; but if you'll forgive me, I'll avow:
if you thought life was bad before, then you should see it now.

And I have never felt more heartbreak; it reaps despite my best
efforts to rip the god-damned thing the fuck out of my chest
and I would tear apart my eyelids if I thought it could help me see
how these diamond eyes bring some folks high, but they just don't fly for me.

I try to consult my conscience but it speaks to me in tongues,
so I'll settle for poisoning my liver and blackening my lungs.



There's a wound in my world but I'm sadder for you for you'll never know happiness, forever uncompleted.

You wanted happiness for us, but he's gone forever and I'm sorry mommy, for I am defeated.

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General / Re: thread of bad: user's guide version
« Last post by rtil on Yesterday at 05:14 PM »
the lowest form of exposition is when characters explain out loud what they already know just for the sake of the audience because the author has no other way of delivering it

this is part of why i don't undersatnd why people love jojo as much as they do. to me it's enjoyable in its absurdity, and i think that's the point, but from a distance the fandom seems to treat it as a literary masterpiece. yet characters constantly stop and explain things out loud at almost any opportunity with no regard to the frame of time they have to actually do it. it's done so often it seems an even worse offender than dbz, a capstone of this trope. it gets a little tiresome when literally every piece of important information is explained to the audience in this way. when there's no subtlety or nuance in your narrative, it's hard to keep it interesting because everything becomes predictable and mundane.
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